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Good Grief Group

Supporting one another through grief

21 January 2025

Our Good Grief group at Selly Park provides an opportunity for people experiencing a palliative diagnosis or following loss the opportunity to get together and talk about their experiences in a friendly and supportive environment. We also run the similar Stepping Stones group at our Erdington site.

The group is therapeutic, and facilitated by qualified counsellors who encourage it to be self-leading. Each group of around 10 people will attend for 12 consecutive weeks on Friday mornings from 10am-12noon.

Good Grief Group

Grief is a deeply personal experience, but it doesn’t have to be faced in isolation. The group is a gathering of individuals who are navigating similar experiences, providing a sense of community, connection and a reminder that others share their pain, even if the experiences differ.

Each week, they begin by checking in with each other and sessions are very participant-led with the support of counsellors. There is an opportunity to chat in smaller groups with a tea or coffee and a check out at the end.

Senior Counsellor Donna Yafai, who facilitates the group with counsellor Winnie Browne, said: “Some people come to the groups after having 1-1 counselling sessions while others come straight to the group. Groups are for some people and not others, and the same for 1-1 sessions, so it’s good to be able to give that choice.

“There’s a great sense of comfort with the group and I think a big part of that is you don’t have to put a game face on – everyone understands each other and you can come in and share exactly how you are without feeling that you have to be OK for everyone else’s sake. What’s been really positive is to see how the group have got together outside of here and that will carry on – that’s testimony to them as a group and feels like a great achievement.”

The emotional weight individuals carry can feel overwhelming and it’s important to remember you are not alone. The group aims to offer a safe and compassionate space to process your emotions and share your experiences with others who truly understand. The hope is that members will continue to keep in touch with one another to offer mutual support.

Group member Kelly McNally added: “It takes a leap of faith to join a group like this, but I think after the first session we were all glad we did it. It is quite a scary step, but it’s worth it. You’re putting yourself out there; a lot of emotions you might not have even spoken about to your closest family, but we feel comfortable doing that. It’s been a very worthwhile experience, and it has helped push me forward to the next stage of my grief journey.”

Karen Cope, whose mom was supported by the Hospice at Home team before she died, said that the benefits of the group really hit home over Christmas, which can be a very difficult time for those who have lost someone close to them.

She said: “Everybody is lovely and it’s just been a really easy group to be part of. That was very evident to me over Christmas because it’s such a busy time and you feel low because you haven’t got your loved ones – I felt like Mom and Dad were missing, that they weren’t part of my Christmas, and I didn’t want to put all of that onto my husband and kids.

“I knew that I could talk about that here because they all get it and a lot of us were feeling the same. When I left, I felt better because I’d brought my parents into my Christmas by talking about them. I wasn’t sure if I’d come that week because I was busy but I’m so glad I did because that’s the time I really needed it.”  

Peter Hunt first started having counselling with the hospice alongside his wife Helen before she died, and moved from pre- to post-bereavement 1-1 sessions before joining the group.

He said: “My wife had a condition that was very rare and unknown in a lot of medical circles, which made it very difficult for us to deal with, so that support really helped. This group has given me a greater understanding of grief and what people go through, and you realise you’re not on your own. Grief affects people in different ways, and at different times, and it gives you strength just knowing people here, getting together and talking.”

Lorraine Davis’s mom was supported with end of life care through Marie Curie who linked her up with Birmingham Hospice for counselling.

She said: “At first I put the card to one side when Mom passed away, saying I didn’t really need this, but deep down I knew I would. I had 1-1 counselling sessions with Winnie at the hospice which were very helpful and I was worried about those ending, so she told me about the group which has been a lifeline. The mask comes off because in everyday life with family and friends, you try to get on with things and I think coming here, building bonds with people and their experiences, and the love and the care we show each other; it helps you in those times where you think you can’t get through the day.

“Hopefully we’ll all keep in touch, but even when I’m not at the group it’s given me the tools to move forward in my own journey and just knowing that other people are sharing in this not very nice experience called grief.”

Find out more about our wellbeing and bereavement support services.